Yo! So I’ve been around, promise. Just busy.

Went deer hunting with my brothers-in law and middle daughter recently. A trip my husband had planned to do that I was resolved to make happen. And then I found out I had to wake up at 3am to make it to the blind by 5am, and it was so damn cold. I drifted off in the dark of the blind and woke up to looking out the side window to like 30 deer running away… whoops. My daughter and one brother in law we were with were facing the front window so I didn’t tell them. I wasn’t shooting anyway. I barely want one deer, let alone two, you know?

Now just so you know, I totally could do it. I’m a good shot and the bastards have eaten my antique roses enough that I’d have no qualms. But deer processing is expensive and venison is not a fav… so it was all about the experience for me and being there for my daughter.

She got her dad’s skills in this too because she might as well have been a sniper with that shot. And so… we have plenty of venison and I’m resolved to never ever ever wake up at 3am again.

Best part of the deer is the backstrap. So we made venison schnitzel out of it the next week. Pounded thin backstrap cutlets, soaked in buttermilk to tenderize and soak out some gaminess, breaded, then finished with brown gravy and lemons… it was to fucking die for.

Lemme show you.

My dudes. It was delicious and my daughter and I did each and every step of that together. That was good bonding too.

The salad is good as well: roasted baby potatoes, tossed with fresh arugula, bit of mayo and seeded mustard. I put a lot of seasoning on them before I roasted the potatoes, so it didn’t need any extra salt or pepper.

It had a very “If you want to make an apple pie first you need to invent the universe.” vibe to it. (Good ol’ Carl Sagan there for ya). And was a real, honest to god meal that we ate at the table. I vaguely remember those. We used to do those everyday.

It was nice.

In other “way to many steps to this shit” things: I had the storage room installed in the back. Should the roof have been oriented the other way for ease of adding on a carport? For sure. That was why Lucas and I had never had a prefab one built there before. But considering how long this bathroom is taking to finish up there was NOOOOO Way I was doing dealing with any more custom construction. So. I used most of my Quarter 4 bonus to build a big ass shed in the backyard.

It will get repainted same as our other shed (at some fucking point. These projects, amiright?!) and hopefully it will stop looking like we have WAAAAY too many sheds in the backyard soon. Sigh. But, as this house doesn’t have a garage, this will now be said garage. I’ve ordered shelves (more projects) and then will start the long process or organizing and emptying our storeroom so I can stop paying for that. It’s almost all holiday, camping, and fishing stuff, as well as all my husband’s papers from college and teaching. The detritus of our life will be hard to go through, don’t I know it.

Some things are hard. What of it.

The shed/storeroom got installed on Monday at 10am. I realized at 8am that the nagging feeling all weekend that I was forgetting something was that I’d forgotten to clean off the slab in preparation for building installation. Awesome. Most of the rest of it was easy, but then there were these piles of antique bricks, some stacked, one pile a jumble. Soooo many geckos and spiders, lemme tell you. I didn’t love it.

Oh and I had to get the driveway clear of all the bathroom remodel trash too? (I don’t have a before pic. It was 2 construction bags of drywall waste and so many sheets of hardibacker and lumber dragged to the front… ugh.)

The installers had to cut down a ton of bamboo too, so I have to figure out what to do with that. They don’t take bamboo for green waste recycling, so I may have to chop it up and burn it, but fun fact- bamboo pops and explodes when burned so that’ll be fun. It’s expensive and would require a trailer to get it to the city dump… I’m letting future me figure that one out, I’ve decided.

But, the building is in, and that’s what matters. One big step taken.

It’s just one foot in front of the other over here, over and over again.

And the plumbers are here today to hook up the tub, toilet, and vanity. The drywall and paint still has to be done. But functionality at least should be pretty forthcoming. And the tile turned out soooo nicely!

I had black schluter edging instead of bullnose tiles put in… it looks so damn good, and so glad my husband’s cousin recommended that over bullnose tile. And they took the tile all the way to the ceiling this time- which it hadn’t been before and always looked crappy to my eye.

It’s sooo close to being done! And once it is, I’ll repaint the bedroom and replace the carpet and man… This place might just be livable, you know? And surprisingly I don’t have any “if only my husband had lived to see it” feelings either. I know he would have liked to, but I also know it wouldn’t have really mattered to him. And besides, the fact is that we were happy in our home before the changes, so it isn’t really missing out. Not really. Not on the part that matters. And he isn’t really even the one who is missing out, that’s still me out here. But I’ll have a bathroom at least.

Let’s just dump a bunch or randomness in here at the bottom of the post. It’s been a while, there is lots to share.

My youngest and I saw a monkey while driving the other day.

I’d rather the lady had been texting and driving than driving with a monkey on her lap, but you don’t get to live other people’s lives for them, unfortunately.

Been feeling very much like this lately, and after much thought I’ve decided it’s a good thing, or at least on the positive end of things.

my neighbor is giving me lots of free eggs lately. She doesn’t sell these because they are half sized, from her Silkie chickens, but the girls and I love nothing more than a tiny over easy egg on a Hawaiian roll so they are perfect for us. Huge bonus is what the chickens they come from look like:

That is not a stock photo pulled off of the internet- that is one of her ACTUAL chickens. ITS SO FLUFFY I’M GONNA DIE.

My wish for 2025 to cut drinking down to 3 or fewer days per week is going well. And many of those days were just one beer days. I do like sitting outside and watching the sunset with a beer and I shan’t deny myself simple pleasures, not in the rest of this lifetime, at least, but I did want to cut back for preventative health reasons. So I’m tracking it on an app and here is what January looked like:

Pretty dang good.

I’ve been taking Wilson out for nightly walks too, and it’s a time I feel very connected to Lucas and they are so nice and peaceful. I hope those neighborly murderers don’t know what a huge coward this dog is; at least he’s big and has a loud bark, and can be a growly bastard when he wants. (don’t tell the murderers that is usually to balloons, though)

It’s rained twice in the last few weeks so I woke up a few times with the shirt I was wearing to bed and my comforter looking like this:

Is this an Agatha Christie book with those perfect fucking muddy paw prints, cats? And which one of you walked on my motherfucking throat in my sleep?! My money is on Asher.

Saw this ad on Instagram and went… I’m sorry, is that supposed to make me want this perfume?

Like… this company knows what canals are, right?

Got some super cheap roses 2 weeks before Valentine’s Day. Thanks growers mistiming their crops by just thiiiis much!

I was really sad about Valentine’s Day a few weeks ago, but that has lifted since I’ve resolved to still write Lucas a love letter as we always used to do. Somehow the thought that my love is unchanged and continues to have a place to go is a comfort. Even if this year I don’t get one in return.

What of it. Some things are hard even after they get lighter. I do the best I can do.

And here are some screenshots from the last few weeks as well:

Okay, that’s it. Let’s go get some tacos, indeed.